Muftiah realized that this was to be her last SUBUD name on earth, and, at the time, she was foolishly disappointed that her name did not have a "Spiritual Meaning"...
What a silly girl she was - the name Muftiah has meant more for her Spiritually... than mere words can ever describe...!
During that year, every now and again, Muftiah would have a strange Latihan Kejiwaan, at the Marin SUBUD House ... in which she would laugh her head off, singing joyfully...:
"December...! December...!" ...
And inside her, there was a "knowing"... that it had to do with the "marriage" that her HEAVENLY FATHER... ALMIGHTY GOD... Had Told her about... during her time of Penance... still feeling as if she was in a state of Disgrace...
And Muftiah protested to HIM... insisting that she functioned in the world so much better as a single person, with plenty of energy and well-being... but that whenever she was married, she spent much of it ill in bed, sapped of vim and vigor, undergoing heavy purification most of the time...
So ALLAH ALMIGHTY GOD Decided To Teach HIS willful daughter... yet another valuable Lesson...:
Shortly after, one night, during group Latihan Kejiwaan... after about ten minutes of Receiving Vigorous Movement... instead of usually Gently Swaying... as she sang Praises to her Beloved CREATOR... the familiar Vibration Suddenly Stopped inside Muftiah... and she Was Made to stand perfectly still... there in the room... with about thirty of her Sisters... Feeling Strangely Empty... And Sad... And Very Foolish...!
And the longer the time passed... as she Was Made to go on... Standing Perfectly Still... the more Empty... and Sad... and Foolish she felt... until she felt she could not stand another second of it...
Then a Voice Spoke Inside Her... Asking Quietly... Whether She Still Did Not Wish To Be Married... Because The Way She Had Just Been Feeling... Would Be How Her Future Unmarried Life Would Be: Empty... Sad... And Very Foolish...!
Muftiah, becoming very afraid, immediately begged forgiveness, pleading that every fiber of her being... would be willing to experience the married state again...
And exactly one year after arriving in Marin, in December... Muftiah, having Received to take the vow of Islam a month earlier... was Brought Together with Farlan... who was already a Muslim...!
At one point... as Muftiah realized that this was really "it"... she went to visit her dear sister Rochanah Weissinger... and told her that she could not possibly fit a husband into her busy life, as well as all the activities she was involved in - she would not know how to cope...
And Rochanah had smiled at her and said:
"You silly girl, now you will have a husband who will be working for you...!"
And Muftiah had felt very stupid, her mouth hanging open, as she said:
"Oh, - I never thought of that...!"
Some five years later, when Muftiah met Rochanah again, she said that she was very surprised... that we were still married... for she had Received... on our wedding day... that our marriage would be very difficult...
And Muftiah had told her how she and Farlan had made a fervent promise to ALLAH ALMIGHTY GOD... that they would endure whatever they had to... in order to become the husband and wife that ALLAH Intended for them to become... - and they have... to this very day... the 3rd of January 1987... some 12 years later... although ALLAH Suddenly Ended the intimate side of their marriage... for good... after only seven years...!
P.S. Beloved BAPAK is here with me in Spirit... directing his series of letters about Love. Marriage and Sex... and wants his daughter Muftiah... to share the following...:
In Muftiah's Spiritual Odyssey... "From Seven Hells... To Seventh Heaven... SUBUD..." ... she describes how soon after Ending the intimate side of her marriage to Farlan... ALLAH Willed her to endure a seven year long... bed-ridden period... suffering with one Stroke after another... she stopped counting them after the 37th!
And during her second year of being confined to her bed... increasingly much too weak to get out of it... ALLAH greatly astonished her... by Suddenly Commanding her... early one morning...:
"Now Write... About Your Childhood... Your Ancestry... Your Life...!"
Thus the 28 years of ALLAH Commanded Writing began... where she could only Write... whenever He Commanded her to... usually for ten hours at a time...
And she quickly came to realize... that she Was Not Permitted... to write from her mind... because whenever she tried to remember something... about an incident in her life... she would Receive such a Stab of Pain in her head... which would Immediately Stop all her thinking...!
She also became aware... that she Was Only To Write... From The Flow Of Her Jiwa... first sitting up in bed... and writing longhand on legal size reams of paper... the first year... until one day... Farlan delighted her... when he Received to buy her a computer to write on...!
And she understood even more... because as her fingers Were Made To Fly over the keyboard... another dimension Was Added... to her Writing...
Her eyes Would Fill With Tears... so that she was unable to see... or read... what she was writing... until the ten hours had passed...!
Of course... when she was writing on paper... ALLAH Filling Her Eyes With Tears... would have ruined her writing... as the Tears would have blotched the paper...
So ALLAH Waited... until she had a computer... To Give her the Extra Dimension...!
And then... when her fingers Were Stilled by ALLAH... and Being Allowed by HIM to read what had come out of her Jiwa... she would always be amazed... at what had been so accurately produced on her computer...
(Allah Almighty God's Commanded 32-Page Open Letter of January 3, 1987... To All SUBUD Brothers and Sisters Throughout The SUBUD World - Part VIII - to be Continued... Insha Allah... God Willing... Thursday 12/16/10...)
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